Ep 13: Is Gratitude Dead in 2020? Six Gratitude Guideposts for Moms with Crohn’s and Colitis

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Are you finding 2020 as challenging as I am?

Covid-19, racial injustices exposed, a chaotic presidential election… each one of these crazy events would be enough to shake you to the core, but we experienced all three of these sucky life events this year.

How do we find hope, optimism, and gratitude in challenging times?

This episode explores several ideas about gratitude with the hope that these gratitude guideposts will help you find your center and your peace and help to heal your IBD in these unprecedented times.

We’re talking about:

• The reason why IBD flare-ups are at an all-time high right now
• The six gratitude guideposts that will keep you calm, centered, and healthy during these uncertain times
• Giving yourself a chance to create your own thankful moment with the small daily experiences of life

And so much more!

After the episode, you’ll feel grateful for the positive aspects in your life (big and small) and use this information to calm your IBD in a time of chaos and uncertainty.

Episode at a Glance:

• [01:36] Have you downloaded your IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook yet? It’s free and you can get it at karynhaley.com/thanksgiving

• [08:29] Research on gratitude is promising, especially for those of us with IBD.

• [11:28] The one small thing you must do before you go to bed that will change your life.

• [13:38] The power of the written word when it comes to gratitude, and it doesn’t have to be in a gratitude journal.

• [15:57] The meditation app that will help you quiet your mom brain.

• [19:02] The “Do it Like a Mom” Gratitude and Gripes practice that will get the kids into the attitude of gratitude too.

• [21:56] The gratitude list that keeps me going during this sucky 2020—and you’re on it!

• [24:54] The best way to take your IBD healing journey to the next level.

Rate, Review and Subscribe on Apple Podcasts.

Episode Links:

Get my free IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook with celebration foods for any holiday you celebrate.

Episode Transcript:

[Music]

INTRO: You are listening to The Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD, a safe space for moms with Crohn’s and colitis, connect, explore powerful tools for healing and transform our lives to thrive in motherhood and in life. I’m your host, Karyn Haley, IBD health coach, integrative wellness enthusiast, and mom to three outstanding kids. After having Crohn’s disease for 30 years and working as a health advocate exclusively with IBD clients for the last 10 years, I know it’s time to bring the types of candid conversations I have with my clients out into the open. It’s our time to go on an IBD healing journey and do it like only a mom can. Let’s do this.

[music]

Did you get your free IBD Thanksgiving Table Cookbook yet?

[01:25] Hey there my dear one, welcome, welcome. It’s Karyn with you today and welcome to the Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD. I know this is a busy week for you if you live in the U.S.  And if you’re listening to this episode when it comes out, it’s actually the day before Thanksgiving. You might be working in the kitchen, making pies, stuffing the Turkey, listening and sharing this time with me as you bake or cook… and by the way, if you’re still struggling to figure out what to make that’s super tasty and awesomely good for your gut, be sure to download my free IBD Thanksgiving Table Cookbook. There’s still time to do that. It’s packed with recipes that have a gut healing twist on your traditional holiday favorites. I’ll put a link for the cookbook is in the show notes but you can also grab it at karynhaley.com/thanksgiving.

But, like I said, if your listening to this episode at the time it airs, I know this is a busy week for you so I’m here today with a shorter than normal episode to break into the mom craze of your week with a quick message of hope and gratitude in trying times my friend. Man, this has been a horrible year hasn’t it? 2020… it sounded so promising. Double 2-0’s… 2020, it’s got alliteration, it’s got a groovy cadence, it just sounded like it was for the cool people didn’t it? Who knew 2020 was going to suck? The uncertainty and the chaos of it all has walloped all of us over the head with a big old “HA, TAKE THAT! Thought IBD was enough for you to handle? Well, take this and that and let’s heap on some more! And this constant hammering into our soul has left us stunned and reeling, and pretty much walking around, although not too far from home and not too close to anyone we love and all masked up, in a daily fog of “is this really my life?”

What a horrible year 2020 has been!

From Covid-19, to opening our eyes to racial injustices, to the mayhem that was the presidential election this year. It doesn’t matter where you stand on any of the issues or where you fall politically. This election season had us all on edge—especially in my family where we politically debate for sport. Whoo-wee it got fiery.

[4:23] Each one of these events would be enough by themselves, right, they would be major life events by themselves, but we’ve dealt with all of these major life stressors in 2020. And we did it all with IBD on our back… or should I say IBD on our gut. IBD flares are at an all-time high for moms this year. The gut brain connection is strong. You’d have to be Wonder Woman to not feel this level of stress and rancor in your gut.

It’s times like this when my first instinct is to pull my covers over my head and hibernate like a bear… not come out until spring. Will it all be over then?

But it’s also times like these that thankfully my eternal optimist peeks its little head out too and asks, “what can I do?” And if you’re struggling to find your eternal optimist, let me carry you just a bit dear one. Let me carry you over the hump until you find yours. She’s in there. I promise, she’s in all of us. She’s quiet at times and in those quiet times we struggle to hear her, but she never leaves us because she knows there’s always hope. There’s always light. Sometimes we just need to ask little miss optimist to turn up the volume and speak a little louder.

Where is your optimism and hope in this moment?

Can you find her with me now mama? Can you see her and feel her around you in this moment? Everyone feels little miss optimism differently. Maybe for you she’s an external warm feeling like a warm blanket that’s wrapped around your shoulders on a cold day. Maybe she’s a gush of calm and peace in your belly. Maybe you hear her whispering in your ear, telling you in her soft melodic voice, everything is going to be OK. Possibly you see her, actually see her, in ethereal robes as an angel or spirit looking out for you. For me, optimism is a light source, a bright goldeny white light that shines through the top of my head and pours through my whole being—always stopping for an moment at my gut to give me extra love and support. But then she continues her light flow through me into my toes and she grounds me and comforts me in times of stress. She reminds me that even in the darkest moments, what I need most is to give gratitude out into the world. For those I know and for those I don’t… gratitude is the road home. The road to peace in these uncertain and complicated times.

[08:29] And it’s not just me saying this about gratitude. I just read an article from Harvard Health, which is a publication from Harvard Medical School, talking about a recent study where this very thought I have about gratitude also played out. Researchers took a group of people and separated them into 3 groups. Each group was asked to complete a weekly writing assignment, but group 1 was told, write about anything that affected you this week, while group 2 was told to write about their gripes of the week, and group 3? Well, they were told to write about something they were grateful for. For 10 weeks, each of these people wrote weekly. I’m sure you are not going to be surprised at the findings.

There’s one finding in the research that might surprise you.

The researchers found that Group #3, the gratitude group, they left the ten weeks feeling more optimistic and better about their life in general. Not only that, but here’s the really cool part, this group also reported exercising more AND they had fewer trips to the doctor during this time. That’s incredible for us isn’t it? If we extrapolate this research just a bit and think about how this affects us, IBD moms, we see that gratitude not only affects our outlook on life, but it can also have an impact on our health in a positive direction. When we find a way to feel gratitude, even in sucky circumstances, it will actually affect our health (and hopefully your Crohn’s or colitis) for the better.

Yes, I love that. I hope it feels just as powerful for you to. Helping you’re IBD is reason enough to try to bring a gratitude practice into your life.

Whether you have an attitude of gratitude (as the cool kids like to say) or you’re feeling a little skeptical at this point (and I know I used to feel this was all woo-woo too), I want to share with you a few thoughts I’ve learned along the way when it comes to gratitude. Hopefully these gratitude guide points will get your juices flowing or spark some new ideas if your gratitude practice needs a little refresher.

[11:28] Here’s 6 ways you can make gratitude work for you even in times that suck:

#1- Schedule your gratitude

Just like anything else in your mom life, it doesn’t happen if you don’t schedule it. My favorite time for gratitude is at the end of the day as I get into bed. Thinking about 3 things I’m grateful for from that particular day gives me a feeling of calm and peace before I drift off to slumber. Some people have a gratitude journal they like to write in, that works too. For me, it’s about giving each thought of gratitude a moment to resonate and create a happy memory for me.

Moving on to gratitude idea #2

Gratitude doesn’t have to be about big moments, the small ones might be even better.

I love being thankful for the smallest of pleasures in life, especially in the current moment we’re living in. The teenier the better. Like last night, one of the 3 things I was grateful for was a smile my hubby gave me as we passed each other in the hall—we like to call each other “ship” because in our busy lives we always feel like we’re like that saying “two ships passing in the night.” Have you heard that expression? So, yesterday he walked by me, smiled and said hey ship. The moment lasted about 1.5 seconds, but it gave me happiness and peace as I remembered this moment at the end of a difficult day.

Gratitude idea #3

[13:38] The power of the written word creates gratitude.

This idea goes back to writing your gratitude. Some like to do this with a gratitude journal. Truth be told, I’m not much of a gratitude journal writer. I’ve heard from lots of moms in our Gut Love Community talking about the benefit of the gratitude journal. I wish I was good at this. I’ve even purchased beautiful “made for gratitude” journals and never committed to them. Maybe your different. Maybe the written gratitude journal is the right path for you. If it is, go for it.

The way that I use the power of the written word with gratitude is by writing handwritten letters. Short ones. Handwriting letters is a dying art, isn’t it? How often do you get a handwritten thank you note from anyone anymore? I love to write a good thank you note or a note to a friend saying, “hey, I’m thinking of you or hey, I’m sorry you’re going through a rough time, or hey, that small thing you did really made my day.” I have cute little stationary I bought especially for my short notes of gratitude too. They’re never long, just a few sentences, but when I’m saying thanks or I’m thinking of you to someone else, it makes me happy and thankful they’re in my life.

We’re making our way through 6 ideas about gratitude and we’ve made it to # 4.

#4 Gratitude is more powerful in the form of prayer or mediation

Whether you’re religious or spiritual or grounded in philosophy, using some form of daily prayer or meditation can help you feel connected to something bigger than what’s going on in your world. It helps you reach outside your universe, think of others and their needs, and think of your connection to all beings everywhere.  I often recommend a free app to IBD mamas called Insight Timer. It’s got great meditations for those of us who can’t quite quiet are mom brain. They’re active and engaging meditations with a theme like healing, grief, grounding, or gratitude. I remember Jill, an IBD Mom in our Gut Love Community who had just given birth to twins. She told me that she loved Insight Timer. Jill told me that spending 10 minutes in the morning with one of their gratitude meditations helped her be more compassionate to her older child and more forgiving of herself throughout the day. I love that story.

#5 Be gentle with your soul

This tags on with what Jill was saying about forgiving herself when she wasn’t as stellar a mom as she wanted to be. Gratitude is never about perfection. It’s not only OK to faulter when it comes to being grateful, it’s expected. It’s OK if you have one day when you can’t muster any gratitude. We all have down days. We all have days that are just crappy.

 Enough with the mom guilt over this. Sometimes we need to have a pity party for ourselves and be ok with that too. I remember when I was a teen dealing with IBD and I’d say to my mom, why did this happen to me or uggghhh, I feel awful… my mom would always remind me that I should be grateful because there are those who have it worse than me. While that may be absolutely true, I learned over the years that it shouldn’t take away my pain. My pain was real and some days it was intense. It’s OK to feel sad for what’s going on in your life. There are times that it does suck. It’s OK if we’re not jumping on the gratitude train every day. As long as you’re living, trust that you will find those small moments of gratitude around you on most days.

Lastly, it’s time for idea #6.

[19:02] #6 is my Do it Like a Mom tip for today

You can do gratitude like the badass mama that you are by sharing gratitude with your kids. Maybe they have their own gratitude journal. Maybe they mediate with you or say their prayers at night. One way I like to share in gratitude with my kids is to have a gratitude and gripes moment at the dinner table each night. Each of us goes around the table and says one thing that happened to us that day that we’re grateful for. I love this moment of the day because each person’s moment usually starts a conversation and as each person tells their moment of gratitude, it fosters a happy feeling lasts for the entire dinner and beyond. I can even see it in the kids after dinner. They’re nicer to each other, if only for a moment…

Gratitude and Grips is for kids too.

You probably noticed I said gratitude and gripes, and yes, at the dinner table, we do gripes too. Like I mentioned with idea # 5, no one should be expected to pull off gratitude all the time. Sometimes a little venting or talking about something that’s not going so well can be beneficial. We use gripes as a way of getting the kids talk about something that’s not going so well too. We can then all show our support and lift that family member up with their struggle. We’ve added on this part to our gratitude practice after the first quarantine and it’s become a safe and supportive place for us to vent. Sometimes we need a place to vent and supportive people to listen.

So there’s my 6 thoughts on gratitude. I hope these ideas get your wheels turning, whether you’re looking for more ways to add gratitude into 2020 or your thinking about adding in a new spark to your already existing gratitude practice.

What are you thankful for today?

Today, as we are so close to Thanksgiving, the official day of thanks, I hope you are able to find some peace and thankful moments to celebrate with your family this year. I’d like to close this episode by telling you what I’m most thankful for right now. The things I’m thinking about today during this sucky time in life for most people of the world.

[21:56] I’m thankful for Zoom dates with my besties who inspire me to be a better wife, mom and friend.

I’m thankful for star gazing night walks with my hubby.

I’m thankful for movie nights with the kids- something we never had time for before Covid.

I’m thankful for every day I have with my mom. Her time on this Earth may be fleeting, but her spirt will go on for eternity.

I’m thankful for warm cups of fall soup—especially my 15-veggie hot soup smoothie.

I’m thankful that 2020 gave me a break from my role as the constant mom chauffer shuttling kids to soccer, piano, dance, clubs, and playdates, and taking teenagers who don’t have a drivers license to work…

I’m thankful for my dog who gives the best hugs on the planet.

I’m thankful for our selfless and dedicated first line workers, nurses and doctors who are doing all the heavy lifting for our country during this pandemic.

I’m thankful for you dear one, for all you’re doing on your IBD healing journey and for joining me each week on the Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD.

And maybe most of all, I’m thankful 2020 is almost over. Now that I think about it, 2021 might just have an even better ring to it. Time will tell.

Just saying my thankful list out loud made me feel gratitude today. It lifts my spirits and makes me happy for the goodness in my life. What would you put on your thankful list today? Take time to think about it before the moment passes. Think about what your thankful for right in this moment. Whether it’s a handwritten list, a memo on your phone, or just a thought in your head. Go for it, I know it will make you smile today.

Happy Thanksgiving dear mama. Until we chat again, I’m wishing you a cheeky and healthy IBD journey.

Chat soon!

[24:54] Thank you so much for joining me today and for listening to today’s episode. When it comes to IBD, I know there’s a lot of resources out there, and I’m truly honored that you chose the Cheeky Podcast to get your IBD information today. If you found this information helpful, please give us a rating and review. It helps other moms find the podcast and see what we’re doing over here to help IBD moms everywhere. And if you feel called feel a call to do it, share this podcast with an IBD mom who you know could really use an uplifting message today, ’cause that’s what we’re all about over here at the Cheeky Podcast.

One last thing, if you’re still with me, and if you are, you’re definitely my kind of gal. We have to get to know each other better. If you’re tired of living on the hamster wheel of IBD with all the ups and downs between flares and remission, if you’re struggling to get control of your abdominal pain, gas, bloating, diarrhea and other troubling IBD symptoms, go to my website. It’s karynhaley.com, and my mom had to be just a little bit different, she spelled my name with the Y. So it’s K-A-R-Y-N H-A-L-E-Y.com and schedule your very own free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble-shooting session with me where we discuss the challenges you’ve been having, we set goals to help you move forward, and we talk about how we can work together to help you get your life back. It’s a power packed 30 minutes. You don’t have to live in IBD status quo. There’s so much that can be done to transform your life so you can thrive in motherhood and thrive with IBD. I’ve seen my clients walk this path and it gives me so much joy to take that journey with them.

My entire coaching practice is run online, so you never have to leave your house and you never have to get out of your jammy or yoga pants for us to work together. You know I’m wearing them to. If you’re ready to take your first amazing step towards healing, I’m ready to chat with you. Schedule your free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble shooting sesh today at karynhaley.com. Click on the work with me tab and I’ll see you soon. It’s important to note that the information in this podcast and in this episode is for general information purposes only and not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The statements made in the Cheeky Podcast for moms with IBD, either by me or my guests, is not intended to diagnose, treat, to cure, or prevent any disease. Before implementing any new treatment protocols, do yourself a favor and consult your physician first.

Thank you so much for listening, for being here, for saving this space for us to spend some time together. Until we chat again, I’m wishing you a cheeky and healthy IBD journey.

Ep 12: Your Top 10 SCD Yogurt Questions Answered

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SCD Yogurt.

It’s the crux of the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, which might just be at the heart of unlocking your IBD healing potential. SCD yogurt is full of beneficial bacteria to help balance your gut flora and bring your IBD into remission.

And when it comes to this homemade fermented yogurt, you know that learning how to make it is only half the battle. Questions about how long to ferment it, how best to store it and for how long, how much to eat, which yogurt maker is best, etc… these questions come up as soon as we hear about it.

Today, on the podcast, we’re tackling your most asked SCD yogurt questions so you can eat this creamy and delicious gut rebuilder with the confidence of an IBD mama who knows she’s doing everything right.

We’re talking about:

• What to do if you leave your yogurt on too long or forget to put it in the frig from the Instant Pot (it happens to all of us!)
• How much yogurt should you be eating every day
• The one IBD ailment that should have you stepping away from yogurt

And so much more!

After the episode, you’ll have all the knowledge you need to be sure that the next time you make SCD yogurt, it’ll be as easy as 1-2-3.

Episode at a Glance:

• [07:21] Your free bonus: The SCD Yogurt Recipe Collection with Most Asked FAQ’s  is waiting for you at karynhaley.com/yogurt

• [10:52] Which yogurt makers I recommend over all others.

• [12:20] Your options for making non-dairy yogurt.

• [14:18] I left my yogurt on too long. What do I do?

• [21:59] How much yogurt should you eat?

• [28:11] I started the yogurt and now I don’t feel well. What happened?

• [36:26] Are you ready to take your gut healing to the next level? Schedule your free IBD Root Cause Troubleshooting Session with me today.

Rate, Review and Subscribe on Apple Podcasts.

Episode Links:

Get my free SCD Yogurt Recipe Collection to help you get stared making your own yogurt (dairy and non-dairy) right away

Also Mentioned in the Episode:

How to Make SCD Yogurt Video

Yogourmet Yogurt Maker

Luvele Yogurt Maker

Euro Cuisine Yogurt Maker

Euro Cuisine Yogurt Strainer

Episode Transcript:

[Music]

INTRO: You are listening to The Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD, a safe space for moms with Crohn’s and colitis, connect, explore powerful tools for healing and transform our lives to thrive in motherhood and in life. I’m your host, Karyn Haley, IBD health coach, integrative wellness enthusiast, and mom to three outstanding kids. After having Crohn’s disease for 30 years and working as a health advocate exclusively with IBD clients for the last 10 years, I know it’s time to bring the types of candid conversations I have with my clients out into the open. It’s our time to go on an IBD healing journey and do it like only a mom can. Let’s do this.

[music]

[00:50] Hello my friend, it’s Karyn here and welcome to the podcast. How’s it going for you today? Has it been a challenging day for you with your IBD or are you feeling well? Lots of ups and downs with IBD, right? Either way, know that I’m thinking of you, sending positive vibes and gratitude your way. I’m excited to have a conversation with you on this episode on an important topic within Specific Carbohydrate Diet. Some of my favorite conversations start with, “On the SCD…” this diet is near and dear to my heart because it’s the diet I started twelve years ago that finally made a difference for my Crohn’s and allowed me to reach remission.

Since then, the SCD has been my place of grounding and centering, every time I need an IBD tune up. I still follow the principles of the diet even today, although now I’m able to tolerate foods outside the plan. But for 2 years, SCD and fanatical adherence was my life. I never purposely strayed, and it served me well. On the SCD, I was able to get off all my Crohn’s medicines, I was able to really be there for my kids in a way I hadn’t been before, and I was able to eat things most people without IBD take for granted. The first time I ate a strawberry without any negative impact, I swear I heard birds singing. Whole raw nuts, pumpkin seeds, leafy green salads, an apple with the skin on… most people take these foods for granted, but not us. And on the SCD, my life opened, transformed, and gave me a new lease on life.

It’s because of the SCD that I do the work I do today, helping moms like you find your best life with IBD. I did learn early on that the SCD doesn’t work for everyone with Crohn’s and colitis, either because it doesn’t fit their lifestyle (it does have a lot of rules and there’s a lot more cooking at home) or because it just doesn’t work for their body. But it does work for the majority of my clients who try it out and when it comes to the SCD, if there’s one thing that stumps IBD moms out there more than anything else, it’s the SCD yogurt. For most moms, it’s different than anything they’ve ever tried before. It has several steps, and you feel like if you make one misstep, you’ll ruin everything. Once you learn to make it though, I swear, it’s like riding a bike. You never forget. At this point, I’ll sometimes go years without having it and then decide it’s time to make some SCD yogurt again. The recipe never leaves me. Once you try it out a couple times, you’ll see how easy it can be. It looks more complicated than it is, just like riding a bike.

Are you wondering how to make SCD yogurt?

[04:49] Now, I know for some of you, you don’t have questions about the process of making the SCD yogurt. You’re just wondering what the heck I’m even talking about, will it benefit you, and how to you make it? If you’re at this stage in your healing journey, I’ve got you covered mama—in two ways. #1 I’ve got a collection of step by step, hold you by the hand, recipes for SCD yogurt. There’s four recipes in total in this collection. One is for dairy yogurt in a yogurt maker. The second is for diary yogurt in an instant pot because I know many people have seen the yogurt function on your I.P. and you’ve wondered, could I make my SCD yogurt in that? Yes, you can! And because I know you’ve asked for it for a while now, I’ve recently added a recipe for non-dairy yogurt with a yogurt maker and non-dairy yogurt with an I.P.

I told you I’ve got you covered mama, any which way you want to make it. If you’re completely new to the world of SCD or GAPS legal yogurt, I’ve got you covered. And if you’re more of a visual person like me, I’ve got you covered there as well. You can check out my SCD Yogurt Making video on YouTube right now on my YouTube channel IBD Health Coach. Long ago in a galaxy way far away (can you tell I’ve been watching Star Wars lately), I think this video was made when I didn’t even know how to video horizontally,(I think it’s vertical- I haven’t watched it in a while), but I made a video about making SCD yogurt for my YouTube channel. While the video structure is a bit dated, the content is still good.

I’ve got an SCD yogurt making tutorial with your name on it.

[07:21] So, if you want a recipe for SCD yogurt (made any way you want to make it) in paper form or in video form, go to the show notes. There’s links there for whichever method works best for you. Heck, feel free to take advantage of both the paper and the video. That’s what they’re there for. If you want to skip the show notes and go straight to the SCD yogurt recipes, you can get them by going to karynhaley.com/yogurt. That’s k-a-r-y-n-h-a-l-e-y.com/yogurt.

Since I already have recipes out in the eithers for SCD legal and GAPS compliant yogurt (BTW, those are both IBD healing diets you should check out and you can by going to Episode 7: 7 Gut Healing Diets for IBD. I’ll link that in the show notes as well) I thought today’s focus on SCD yogurt would be best if I answered your most asked questions. I get tons of questions about SCD yogurt, probably on a daily basis, so today, we’re going to address the ones I get most often.

These questions will be great for you if you’re in the beginning stages of SCD making and you’re struggling to find answers to your most pressing yogurt making questions or before you’ve decided to dive into yogurt. This is a great time because we’ll get all your questions out of the way before you even begin.

And BTW, whether you’re on SCD, or GAPS, or just eating for IBD healing in general, I highly recommend eating homemade fermented yogurt. It’s just about the best source to improve the quality of the bacteria in your microbiome, and give you relief from your IBD symptoms like abdominal pain, bloating, gas, diarrhea… even IBD related conditions like arthritis and skin rashes. Balancing the flora in your gut is key to healing IBD so whether you’re on a SCD or not, this yogurt (dairy or non-dairy) is crucial for when you use food on your healing journey.

There’s only one type of IBD ailment that I don’t recommend yogurt for and wait and see, because I’ll talk about that later in this episode.

So without further ado, let’s get to it.

Your Top 10 SCD Yogurt Making Stumpers I get asked all the time starts here.

[10:52] #1 Do you recommend one yogurt maker over another?

Yes, I do. I have 3 favorites. The Yogourmet is the one I use. I’ve had it forever with no problems. There’s a link for it in the show notes. Also, there’s a newer, top of the line yogurt maker called the Luvele. It’s supposed to be really great too. I haven’t used it myself, but I’ve recommended it to several clients who love it. The Luvele even has an automatic shut off feature, something the older yogurt makers don’t have. For an economy option, I like the Euro Cuisine yogurt maker. It’s less money, but not less on functionality. These yogurt makers are also linked in the show notes so you can check them out.

[12:20] #2 Is it possible to make a non-dairy yogurt (meaning no lactose- the milk sugar and no casein- the protein found in dairy) and will I still get the same probiotic benefit?

Yes, it is possible to make SCD legal or GAPS friendly yogurt that’s dairy free. My favorite option for non-dairy yogurt is using coconut milk, but you can also make yogurt with almond milk (though I think this one takes patience and practice to perfect). If you have had has success with almond or cashew milk yogurt, please let me know. I’ll share your suggestions with our Gut Love Community of IBD Mamas.

Remember I’ve got recipes for non-dairy yogurt in the show notes or at karynhaley.com/yogurt if you need a good recipe. And yes, to answer the other part of the question about the probiotic benefit, yes, the probiotic benefits will still be intact. Making yogurt dairy free is a great way to get the same benefit from the SCD yogurt without the dairy that may increase your inflammation in your body.

[14:18] #3 I stated making my yogurt and didn’t realize I wouldn’t be home when my 24 hours were up. What can I do?

Most yogurt makers do not have automatic shut off options. As far as I know, the only option that has an automatic shut off is the Luvele yogurt maker. You do have a fairly large window of time for fermenting though (24-30 hours). As long as you put the yogurt in the frig to “set” during that timeframe, you should be fine leaving it on a bit longer than planned.  According to Elaine Gottschall, the author of Breaking the Vicious Cycle, and ultimate SCD mama herself, fermented yogurt for up to 29 hours is fine. After 30 it starts to kill the good bacteria. After 36 hours and it will not last for you in the frig as long as it normally would. Plus, the longer it goes the more tart it tastes.

There’s also a very similar question I get is from Instant Potters.

[16:07] #4 I made my yogurt in the Instant Pot. It turned off after 24 hours (while I was sleeping). Can I still put it in the refrigerator in the morning and eat it?

For moms who use the I.P. to make their yogurt, I hear this question all the time. So, just to give you an example of how this might play out: let’s say there’s an IBD mama who left her yogurt in the instant pot overnight, and it turned off at 11pm) but she forgot to put it in the frig. She’s wondering: can I still use it? The answer is usually yes, but follow the rules above for best results. So, up to 30 hours is fine. When you get above that (because remember it still ferments at room temp) so you will start killing off some of the beneficial bacteria. In my opinion, if you get over 32 hours, it’s probably best to discard it and start again.

Bottom line here, no matter which device you use: a yogurt maker that doesn’t have auto shut off, and yogurt maker with auto shut off, an instant pot or even a crockpot…  accidents happen to us all. Give yourself a break knowing we are all human and make mistakes and move on with confidence that the next batch will turn out better.

[18:15] #5 What is yogurt dripping and do I have to drip my yogurt?

Regular SCD yogurt is not as thick as commercial yogurt. If you like a thicker, creamier, Greek style yogurt, you can “drip” it to remove the whey and make it thicker. The whey is the whitish, watery substance that rises to the top of the yogurt and makes the milk less creamy.

There’s several methods to drip your yogurt. The easiest involves a tool called the Euro Cuisine Yogurt Strainer. I’ll link to it in the show notes so you can check it out. It’s so simple to use. Just add your yogurt to the top of the container, place it in the refrigerator and let the magic happen. The whey will drip to the bottom, leaving a creamy yogurt at the top. You can then place the yogurt in a glass container and put it in your refrigerator.

You can drip anywhere from 3-24 hours. At the 3-hour mark, it will be like the yogurt you get in the grocery store. At the 24 mark, it will be drier and thicker like cream cheese. In fact, you can use it as a cream cheese replacement in recipes quite nicely. Feel free to play around the amount of time you drip and use your dripped yogurt in recipes in place of anything from Greek yogurt to cream cheese.

So, let’s say you don’t have a Euro Cuisine? You can also drip your yogurt with a cheese cloth and a strainer or use coffee filters.

Unless I’m making my yogurt for a particular recipe, I don’t usually drip it at all. I’ve been making yogurt so long that I came up in a generation of non-drippers, but it seems like now that there are appliances for “dripping” yogurt, it’s all the range. Use your personal preference as your guide.

[21:59] #6 How much yogurt should I eat?

Most people can eat up to 2 cups of yogurt a day. You can divide this into 2 portions or eat it at once. Let your symptoms and your intuition be your guide. For some people ½ a cup of yogurt is enough to bring their digestive challenges into balance. Some people find that more yogurt than even ½ a cup gives them constipation. Elaine said that a person could go up to 3 cups a day, but more than that would be detrimental to their health.

A follow up question I get to this question is: So, can I then start with my recommended amount?

No, I would not start with, let’s say, 1 cup of yogurt a day. I would start with just a spoonful a day and work your way up. Most of my clients can start with a spoonful and tolerate it well. Keep in mind, you are adding in loads of beneficial bacteria and there is bound to be some “die off” here. Die off is what happens when we add in beneficial bacteria to help the gut heal. During the early stages of this, the body releases toxins due to a flushing out of the old to make room for a new, healthier system. Symptoms like diarrhea, stomach cramping, bloating, gas, brain fog, poor concentration, irritation, anxiety, etc… are all normal when adding any type of probiotic into your body. The yogurt as you’ll see when you look at the recipe, is a probiotic at its core. Be patient, but persistent. The symptoms should clear up in a few days to a couple weeks.

Occasionally, I have worked with clients whose bodies are so sensitive that they cannot tolerate even a spoonful of yogurt a day. Moms with super sensitive guts should not give up. I have had clients that start by just putting the yogurt to the tip of their tongue and working their way up from there.

The key is to listen to your body. It will tell you all you need to know.

[26:03] #7 How long will my yogurt keep in the frig?

The probiotic benefit will usually last about 2 weeks, though you can keep eating the yogurt if it’s still fresh.

[26:25] #8 If I use my yogurt in baking or cooking, will I still get the probiotic benefit?

No, you will not. Heating up the yogurt diminishes the probiotic benefit, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t use your yogurt in baking or cooking. I use mine all the time in homemade salad dressings, sauces, cookies, pancakes, breads, etc… It’s a great way to add “milk” to a recipe without the lactose or dairy if you make the non-dairy version.

[27:22] #9 Can I freeze my yogurt?

Yes, you can freeze your yogurt when it’s done and you can also freeze the milk and starter before you use them. However, do not eat it frozen if you want to get a probiotic benefit from it. You will need to thaw it back to refrigerator temperature. You may also lose a bit of the probiotic if you freeze it.

[28:11] #10 I’m having digestive troubles after starting the yogurt. What should I do?

What we have to do here is figure out if you are having a “die-off” reaction or a true food sensitivity.

#1- if you think you are sensitive to dairy (all dairy, not just the lactose in dairy), it’s best to hold off on adding dairy into your SCD diet for about a month after starting the SCD.

#2- When you do introduce yogurt, whenever the time is right, do it very slowly. Never start with a whole cup. It’s likely you’ll experience the die off symptoms I mentioned before. Remember, start with about 1 tsp, do that for a few days, then increase to a tbsp, and so on until you reach your desired amount. If that is too much for you, you can even start with just the whey of the yogurt (the watery part of the yogurt). My client Leslie was so sensitive to the yogurt that she started with a tiny drop of whey in a full glass of water. She kept increasing the whey and lessening the water. Over time, she was able to move into yogurt. This can take time, but trust me, it’s worth all the effort. Balancing the bacteria in your microbiome is a key step to healing your IBD.

What if dairy doesn’t work for me?

[30:46] #3- Please know that you never have to have dairy yogurt. If you know without a shadow of a doubt that dairy yogurt doesn’t work for you, don’t make it. Make diary free yogurt instead. You may be able to avoid digestive symptoms all together if you avoid dairy.

Everyone is different. I see some clients who thrive on diary yogurt and some who do horribly on it. Everyone is unique. Spend the time finding the right yogurt for you to help balance your gut bacteria.

Yogurt may not be the answer for you at all if you have constipation.

[31:49] Lastly, yogurt isn’t for everyone, especially if you tend more toward constipation. And here we are at the one case where I don’t recommend yogurt. In cases like these, I often recommend sauerkraut instead of yogurt. Sauerkraut is also fermented, it’s alot like yogurt and full of beneficial gut bacteria. This fermented cabbage is an awesome probiotic for the system and a great way for you to get into other fermented veggies, which is really the ultimate goal as your digestive tract heals. Most IBD guts are not ready for this in the beginning, so we work our way to up it with homemade fermented yogurt first.

See how the bottom line here is, no matter how you do it, with dairy yogurt, with non-dairy yogurt or with fermented vegetables– find a way to balance the bacteria in your gut. It’s crucial and it’s key. The way you do this will differ from one IBD mom to the next because our digestive symptoms are all different.

Well, that’s a wrap on my Top 10 SCD Yogurt Making Stumpers I Get Asked All the Time. These are my most frequently asked questions. I know there’s more questions out there and in all four of your SCD yogurt making recipes, the ones you can download at karynhaley.com/yogurt, you’ll see even more of these yogurt making questions answered. There’s a pretty extensive FAQ section there with even more common questions that come up for IBD mamas.

[34:14] How can you Do it Like a Mom when it comes to SCD yogurt?

1. Get really comfortable with the yogurt making steps before you start. If you need to listen to this episode again and take notes, do it.
2. Ask questions when you don’t understand something. There’s bound to be a part of the process that confuses you. Get the facts before you try it out.
3. Know that you will make missteps with yogurt. It’s OK, we all do it. Try to laugh it out and know that you’re in good company. bbb
4. Go slow, slow, slow. This isn’t a race to the finish line. Go slow with yogurt and it will serve you well.

Remember, I love connecting with you. If questions come up that I haven’t answered for you, please reach out. If I don’t know the answer, I’ll definitely have fun finding it out for you. I geek out on IBD healing foods like SCD yogurt and I love finding out more facts about this IBD miracle food every day.

As we wrap up, know that I’m thinking of you as you move along on your IBD journey. We’re in this together mom friend. No matter where we are in the world, we’re in this together, supporting each other as we do our best to heal our IBD every day.

Sending you love and support and cheeky mama healing vibes.

Chat soon!

[36:26] Thank you so much for joining me today and for listening to today’s episode. When it comes to IBD, I know there’s a lot of resources out there, and I’m truly honored that you chose the Cheeky Podcast to get your IBD information today. If you found this information helpful, please give us a rating and review. It helps other moms find the podcast and see what we’re doing over here to help IBD moms everywhere. And if you feel called feel a call to do it, share this podcast with an IBD mom who you know could really use an uplifting message today, ’cause that’s what we’re all about over here at the Cheeky Podcast.

One last thing, if you’re still with me, and if you are, you’re definitely my kind of gal. We have to get to know each other better. If you’re tired of living on the hamster wheel of IBD with all the ups and downs between flares and remission, if you’re struggling to get control of your abdominal pain, gas, bloating, diarrhea and other troubling IBD symptoms, go to my website. It’s karynhaley.com, and my mom had to be just a little bit different, she spelled my name with the Y. So it’s K-A-R-Y-N H-A-L-E-Y.com and schedule your very own free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble-shooting session with me where we discuss the challenges you’ve been having, we set goals to help you move forward, and we talk about how we can work together to help you get your life back. It’s a power packed 30 minutes. You don’t have to live in IBD status quo. There’s so much that can be done to transform your life so you can thrive in motherhood and thrive with IBD. I’ve seen my clients walk this path and it gives me so much joy to take that journey with them.

My entire coaching practice is run online, so you never have to leave your house and you never have to get out of your jammy or yoga pants for us to work together. You know I’m wearing them to. If you’re ready to take your first amazing step towards healing, I’m ready to chat with you. Schedule your free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble shooting sesh today at karynhaley.com. Click on the work with me tab and I’ll see you soon. It’s important to note that the information in this podcast and in this episode is for general information purposes only and not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The statements made in the Cheeky Podcast for moms with IBD, either by me or my guests, is not intended to diagnose, treat, to cure, or prevent any disease. Before implementing any new treatment protocols, do yourself a favor and consult your physician first.

Thank you so much for listening, for being here, for saving this space for us to spend some time together. Until we chat again, I’m wishing you a cheeky and healthy IBD journey.

Ep 11: An IBD Friendly Thanksgiving: Delish Traditional Recipes with a Crohn’s and Colitis Gut Friendly Twist

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With Thanksgiving just around the corner, it’s time to start thinking about what you’re going to serve up for this holiday of thanks.

Will you be serving the same old Thanksgiving food that makes you feel bloated and gassy? The kind of foods that cause you to loosen your pants after the meal (even when they’re elastic) with achy gut pain and a quick trip to the bathroom…  maybe multiple trips?

2020 has been awful enough!

It’s time to Do it Like a Mom and take the reins on a gut lovin’ holiday meal that won’t leave your IBD in the toilet. The simple act of tweaking your holiday favorites into something more Crohn’s and colitis friendly (yet still makes your taste buds happy) is something you have control over in this time of chaos.

In this episode, I’m giving you my entire IBD Foodie Thanksgiving menu, complete with all the fixings and recipes you need, so you can make this Thanksgiving meal your best one yet.

We’re talking about:

• How this IBD friendly Thanksgiving will be so delish that you’ll want to bring out these recipes more than once a year
• The best gut friendly recipe tweaks for all your Thanksgiving favorites like the turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, sweet potato casserole, green bean casserole, and many more traditional eats. You won’t miss those old standards at all.
• Thanksgiving desserts that won’t leave you with what I like to call “soccer ball belly” (when your belly is so bloated, it feels like your carrying around a soccer ball in your stomach)

And so much more!

After this episode, you’ll have everything you need to whip up an absolutely memorable Thanksgiving Day feast for your taste buds and your belly. Isn’t it time you took control of the Thanksgiving narrative and heard your belly say “thanks” on Thanksgiving?  You’ve got this mama! And I’ve got you covered. Let’s dive in.

Episode at a Glance:

• [04:12] Your free bonus: The IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook

• [7:16] The reason why I celebrate Thanksgiving two times a year and the reason you might want to too.

• [12:14] The problem with the Standard American Thanksgiving and how we can tweak it just a bit to make it much healthier for our Crohn’s and colitis belly.

• [14:30] From turkey to stuffing, mashed potatoes to sweet potato casserole and green bean casserole… we go through all your Thanksgiving favorites and twist the recipe just a bit to make it gut friendly, healthy, and tasty for the whole family.

• [25:26] We chat about a few more gut friendly side dishes you’ll love, plus we can’t forget dessert. Pumpkin pie, pecan pie, and nut butter kiss cookies—yep, we talk about those recipes as well.

• [28:43] Eating Thanksgiving at home this year? Follow these tips to make your holiday memorial, tasty, and a meal you don’t have to run to the bathroom after.

• [30:03] Eating Thanksgiving at a friend or family member’s house? Follow these tips as your guide for a safe and healthy, memorable meal this year.

[35:10] Are you ready to take your gut healing to the next level? Schedule your free IBD Root Cause Troubleshooting Session with me today.

Rate, Review and Subscribe on Apple Podcasts.

Episode Links:

Get Your IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook Right Here. It will give you access to all the mouth watering and gut friendly recipes that were mentioned in this episode.

An IBD Friendly Thanksgiving: Delish Traditional Recipes with a Crohn’s and Colitis Gut Friendly Twist

Episode Transcript:

Win a copy of my cold and flu buster recipe guide (you’ve got the ingredients right in your kitchen). Details below…

[00:01] Hey there, Karyn here. Before we dive into the episode today, I wanted to take a quick moment to say thank you. Thanks for hanging out with me for the last couple months, and for your emails and texts with positive feedback for the show. Being here with you every Wednesday is something I really look forward to as we share our IBD mom journey together. It’s a dream come true to connect with you. I’m especially thankful to those who have taken the time to leave a positive review of the podcast on iTunes—like soccermom814 who wrote: “This is exactly what I’ve been waiting for! The focus on moms is perfect for me. I was diagnosed with IBD last year and I just can’t get information like this from my doctor. Thanks Karen!” That’s awesome soccermom814. Soccer moms unite! We’re in this together mama and I’m so glad you’re enjoying the show.

I know it takes time out of your busy day to leave a rating and review, and I appreciate it when you do. It helps other moms find the podcast so we can support each other on our IBD journey. And to say thank you for you for leaving a rating and review, I’m currently giving away my Kitchen Arsenal Cure guide just in time for cold and flu season, and of course coronavirus, although that’s more like an always thing for the moment. Keeping your immune system healthy is more important than ever. If you want to get your hands on my kitchen arsenal cure with 2 recipes to boost your immune system with ingredients you already have in your house, leave me a rating and review (a positive one I hope) on iTunes. Once you do, take a screen shot of it and email it to me with the subject line podcast review. I’ll immediately send my kitchen arsenal Cure recipe guide your way to say thanks for spreading the love and joy. Whether you leave a review or not, know that I appreciate you and thank you for listening to the show. Now let’s get to it.

[Music]

INTRO: You are listening to The Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD, a safe space for moms with Crohn’s and colitis, connect, explore powerful tools for healing and transform our lives to thrive in motherhood and in life. I’m your host, Karyn Haley, IBD health coach, integrative wellness enthusiast, and mom to three outstanding kids. After having Crohn’s disease for 30 years and working as a health advocate exclusively with IBD clients for the last 10 years, I know it’s time to bring the types of candid conversations I have with my clients out into the open. It’s our time to go on an IBD healing journey and do it like only a mom can. Let’s do this.

[music]

[03:07] Welcome, welcome dear listener. Karyn here and I’m so happy and grateful to be with you on another episode of The Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD. I love our topic today. It’s probably my favorite conversation of the whole year, and every year at this time. We’re talking Thanksgiving Food!!! And I know this is an American holiday so my friends in Belgium, Denmark, Argentina, the UK… and the amazing ladies in the wonderful countries you tune in from. I see you, and I appreciate you. To you mamas outside the US specifically, I promise, even if you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving, you’re still going to love this episode and these recipes we’re talking about because they’re absolutely tasty enough to use them for any holiday, even for everyday cooking if you choose.

Finally, an answer to the question: What can I make for Thanksgiving that’s healthy for my belly and makes my taste buds happy?

Before we dive into the meat of our convo today, I’m so excited about something that I can’t wait any longer. I have to tell you upfront that there’s an awesome bonus waiting for you at karynhaley.com/thanksgiving. It’s my best, most comprehensive Thanksgiving cookbook to date. It’s got all the recipes we’re talking about in today’s episode, it’s going to cut your Thanksgiving stress of what should I make in half, and it’s going to give you peace of mind this year knowing you are eating tasty AND gut healthy food to help your IBD heal. Love it! If you want my recently updated Thanksgiving cookbook: The IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table, all you have to do to grab it head on over the show notes to grab it or go to karynhaley.com/thanksgiving

OK, on with the show.

[05:27] Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday of the year. It didn’t used to be. Truthfully, I’ve never really been a fan of turkey.  But after I started eating IBD healing foods, all that changed. Thanksgiving soon became by favorite holiday of the year and all because of the food—these IBD friendly recipes we’re talking about today, I experimented with and honed over my years of eating to heal IBD instead of eating food that fought against it… I learned to make it the most delicious, yet gut friendly meal I have, and my family has and my extended family and friends have when we’re not in quarantine. And now, today I the episode, I’m sharing these menu ideas with you so you can have the same delicious, gut loving experience at your holiday table.

The weird, but true story of why I celebrate Thanksgiving twice a year. And why you can too!

Truth be told, I actually have Thanksgiving twice a year at my house—sort of. You see, I have another date built on gratitude that I celebrate every year. My own day of thanks—just like thanksgiving—only this date is my personal Independence Day of gratitude and love to commemorate and celebrate when I found a way out of my complicated and often agonizing relationship with IBD. For me, that other day of thanks is July 4^th, yes, Independence Day for those of us the United States. While, of course, I do celebrate the birth of the United States on that day with fireworks and friends, I also celebrate how far I’ve come on that day too.

[07:16] Travel back in time with me for just a brief moment and I promise I’ll bring this story back around to juicy Thanksgiving food. The year is 2008, twelve years ago, and the month is January. January, a time of new beginnings, hope, and resolutions. After 5 years of contemplating the Specific Carbohydrate Diet—yes, 5 years and that’s a whole nother story for a whole nother episode. But there I am, contemplating where my life is going like many of us do this time of year, thinking nothing I’ve tried medically has worked for my Crohn’s in 20 years. I’ve been on every medication available, I’ve had 2 bowel resections, in total almost 10 feet of bowel removed, and, where am I? Am I any closer to remission? Not even close. Not one pain free day, not one day away from wondering when I’d have to rush to the bathroom next, not one day feeling more than “other” in the world.

So, by January of 2008, after 20 years suffering with Crohn’s, I finally thought to myself, it’s time to go back to this SCD thing, this Breaking the Vicious Cycle book that when I read it the first time, it looked like it was written in Greek, but instinctively, I knew it was time to go back to it. I remember saying to myself, this is your time, you’re ready, this time you’ll understand what you read. So, I did it. It took me a few months to get it, to contemplate and make a plan, but finally I picked a date. A date where I would declare my independence from the chains of IBD. I was going in with knowledge and power, I would strike out on my own, start the SCD no matter who did or did not support me (and there were many on both sides), but I would finally take the reins on my own healing journey.

Well, that day turned out to be July 4^th, 2008 and every year on that day since, along with the birth of the good ole US of A, I also celebrate my independence day with a massive party, serving my favorite food of all. And as I bring this story back around in a full circle moment (too late), I’m sure you can guess what my favorite food of all the food in the whole world is? The food I serve not only on this Independence Day celebration of mine…you guessed it. It’s my Thanksgiving menu. The menu very menu I’m going to share with you today.  So, while I love this gut healing Thanksgiving food so much and it holds a sacred space for my Thanksgiving dinner, know that it also holds the record of being the food I love so much, that I also serve it up on my very own independence day, every year.

That’s how much I know you are going to love the food we are talking about today and if Thanksgiving wasn’t your favorite holiday just like it didn’t used to be mine, you better believe it’s going to be now. You’re going to love Thanksgiving so much that you’ll find another time of year to eat this food too!

Let’s dive in!

So, what’s typically on an American Thanksgiving table?

It might vary just a bit depending on where you live in the country—my husband is from the south and I’m from the north so when we got married and went to each other’s families for Thanksgiving, it was fun to see the cultural differences in the food. What you serve might also depend on what your family traditions are, but I bet for the most part, it resembles something like this:

Thanksgiving means a turkey, stuffing (as it’s called in the north) or dressing (in my hubby’s southern family), mashed potatoes, gravy, sweet potato casserole, green bean casserole, bread like yeasty rolls or corn bread, and of course pumpkin pie for dessert.

Is your mouth watering yet? And how’d I do? Pretty close to the typical thanksgiving, right?

[12:14] It’s definitely tasty, but is there anything about the Thanksgiving I just described that’s gut friendly? I honestly can’t think of a single thing on that list that checks the gut friendly box. It’s loaded with complex carbohydrates and those carbs turn into sugar and that equals a plethora of pathogenic bacteria in our gut, which is IBD kryptonite and leads to that lovely gut disruption like abdominal pain, bloating, gas, and diarrhea. It’s also full of gluten… that gluey protein that’s also a gut disruptor and causes intestinal permeability for many of us, it’s that leaky gut problem that leads to undigested food particles that enter our blood stream. Thanksgiving food is also full of unhealthy fats, loads of sugar, processed ingredients, chemicals, and artificial flavorings… not a good look for your gut, or your blood pressure or your heart either.

Before I figured out how to eat to support my IBD, I was always sick after Thanksgiving dinner. Maybe you can relate to this– Lots of time in the bathroom after the meal, lots of time spent with a heating pad on my belly to sooth my aching gut, lots of time wondering what I did wrong…

No more. No more of that for me and no more of that for you. It’s time to turn Thanksgiving upside down. And before you start thinking, I’m turning your beloved holiday into something you’ll no longer recognize with roots, berries, kale, and quinoa… I promise, I can give you a similar, but healthy gut loving substitute for every single menu item I just mentioned. A menu item I personally think is much tastier than its standard American counterpart. And as the added bonus, all of us mamas want, your family will love it too.

[14:30] Let’ start with the star of our Thanksgiving dinner: Tom the Turkey.

With Tom, there’s actually not too many problems here, unless you’re a vegetarian of course. And no worries if you are because most everything else for Thanksgiving can be made vegan or vegetarian. But turkey’s, for the most part, are gut healthy. I just want you to keep a few things in mind when it comes to your bird.

First of all, try to get the best quality bird you can afford. Many people with IBD are sensitive to hormones added to poultry so definitely try to find a turkey that’s free of hormones. And sensitivity is really just the start of the problems we experience with added hormones. Hormones added to meat disrupt your entire endocrine system so stay away from meat with hormones. The absolute best place to get your turkey is a pasture raised turkey from a local farm. Fresh, quality meat, delicious… I know not everyone lives in an area with a local farm close by, but local farms like this are growing in popularity so get your bird from a local farmer if you can. If a farm isn’t an option, how about a health food store? They also have really high quality options when it comes to turkey. Again, this may not be an option for you, so in that case, head to your local grocery store and see if they have an organic bird, if not, make sure it’s free of hormones, and flavorings and seasonings.

We already talked about the danger of hormones, but flavorings and seasons are problematic too. Flavorings usually contain gluten, a known gut disruptor, and as well as artificial ingredients you may not even know you’re sensitive to.

There’s so much more we could talk about when it comes to selecting your turkey, cooking times and temps for your turkey, how to easily season your turkey since you’re buying it plain now… and thankfully you’ll get all that and more in your IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook when you download it at karynhaley.com/thanksgiving. There’s a whole page dedicated to turkey cooking info so I feel comfortable leaving Tom here as you are in good hands with the cookbook, I promise.

The gut healthy version of mashed potatoes.

Next on the thanksgiving table is the mashed potatoes. Yes, mashed potatoes are gluten free so know that you are good there, but remember the complex carb factor I mentioned earlier. Potatoes are loaded with gut disrupting complex carbohydrates—ones that make it difficult to digest and absorb. When we’ve got IBD, we want to stay away from complex carbohydrates and instead focus on the carbs we can digest- simple carbohydrates.

Fortunately, there’s an absolutely delicious mashed potato alternative you can have at Thanksgiving and year round if you choose. It’s a really ugly, but don’t judge a book by its cover, vegetable called celery root. Have you ever seen celery root before? Before it was recommended to me, I had never heard of it. Celery root, or celeriac as it’s sometimes called is a cousin of celery and it does have a green stalk at the top of it, and it also does smell a little like celery. But that’s where the similarity ends because instead of eating the green stalky part, you’re actually eating the root, which looks a lot like a hairy potato. Can you imagine a large hairy potato? Yep, you’ve got it, ugly!

When I first started eating celery root, I used to have to go to the health food store to find it. Now, I see it everywhere where I live in Maryland. Safeway, Food Lion, Giant, Wegmans… they all have it. You may never have seen it, but look for it in the produce section. I bet you’ll find it. Ask your produce helper if you don’t see it.

So, how do we get this brown hairy thing looking and tasting like mashed  potatoes? We start by peeling it, just like a potato, then chopping it just like a potato, and then we cook it in water or broth, just like a potato. Unlike using a masher though, I recommend putting your cooked celery root in the blender and blending it until smooth. There’s a great recipe for you to check out in your Thanksgiving cookbook for mashed celery root. It’s delish plain, but feel free to add gravy to it if you want.

Let’s not forget the gravy!

And speaking of gravy… should you eat that on Thanksgiving Day? Probably not. Most store bought gravy is full of chemicals, preservatives and gluten—not IBD friendly. There are some store bought gluten free gravies that aren’t so bad like the one from Simply organic (it’s a powder) or Imagine brand makes a ready to serve gluten free gravy that you just heat up. If you’re looking to take a baby step in the realm of IBD foodie land, I recommend this option.

If you’re ready to go all in on gut healing, I recommend you make your own gravy at home. You still make it from the turkey drippings, just like your grandmama does, but your thickener is a healthier flour like coconut flour. If you want a little trick to give your gravy a nice dark, rich color, I know it might sound crazy, but you add just a bit of almond butter. Just try it. I remember hearing about it, thinking it wouldn’t work and would just taste like almonds, but it doesn’t. It just gives your gravy a beautiful golden color.

Of course, there’s other ways to make gut friendly gravy too and one of those ways uses a cooked onion as a thickener. There’s a recipe for that in your cookbook as well.

Did you think I forgot about the stuffing as my family calls it? Heck no. My gluten and grain free stuffing is the highlight of our Thanksgiving table. My whole family loves it. On this one, I’m gonna come right out and tell you, it’s different than stove top or even homemade stuffing. It’s not light, fluffy, and bready. It’s more of a delicious casserole with ingredients like ground sausage, cranberries, onions and celery. But it is truly worth an open mind because everyone who celebrates Thanksgiving at my house always asks if I’m making my famous stuffing. The recipe for my sweet and savory stuffing is in your IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook and so is a more gourmet version as well if you’re feeling a little fancy for the occasion.

The sweet potato casserole substitute your whole family will love.

Now, Thanksgiving wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without the sweet potato casserole would it? Brown sugar, flour, marshmallows? Definitely tasty, but also definitely a one-way trip down a mineshaft for IBDer’s. There’s just too unhealthy ingredients in there for us to tolerate.

Now, one option for you to consider is a healthier sweet potato option. Lots of mamas with IBD tolerate sweet potatoes just fine. Moms on a whole food, gluten free, or paleo approach eat sweet potatoes. If that’s you, go for it with the sweet potatoes. Maybe a whole baked sweet potato or sweet potato mash topped with cinnamon, butter and honey or maple syrup. That would be delish.

If you’re like me and sweet potatoes are a little too starchy for your digestion or if you’re on the SCD, GAPS, or Autoimmune Paleo eating plan, I’ve got a sweet potato substitute you’re going to love! And it’s star ingredient is butternut squash. Oh yes, don’t poo poo it if you’ve never had it. I definitely did before I ate it in this recipe. My candied butternut squash will blow your mind and you’ll never miss the sweet potato casserole again. Of course, the recipe is in the IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook so it’s all yours when you download your copy.

One word of caution about this recipe, the candied part is a sweet and nutty topping. If you are sensitive to nuts, I’d omit this part. The butternut squash is still sweet and tangy and delicious on its own too.

Is your mouth watering yet? Oh yeah, mine is too.

Even more Thanksgiving recipes await, including dessert!

[25:26] As we wrap up this Thanksgiving feast chat, I do want to mention a few more side dishes you won’t want and you won’t have to go without. These side dishes are all in my Thanksgiving cookbook as well. I think you’ll love my green bean casserole substitute. It’s a recipe for green beans almandine and a little tip to make this recipe super special is to use fresh green beans. Most grocers carry them this time of year. It really brings the dish up a notch from good to yum. And let’s not forget the dinner biscuits or rolls. It’s just not a Thanksgiving feast without bread and butter. Even on a an IBD foodie diet, whether it’s gluten free, paleo, SCD or any of the others, there’s scrumptious dinner roll recipes you can make. I’ve included my favorite dinner biscuits in your Thanksgiving cookbook. And there’s even a recipe for Spiced Apple Cider in there. Your family will rave about it. Every year on Thanksgiving, I get this recipe going in the crockpot, bright and early. With the cinnamon sticks and fresh cranberries in the mix, the whole house starts to smell like heaven before I even put the turkey in the oven. Trust me, your kids are gonna love this festive soda substitute too.

One last Thanksgiving note that we can’t forget about… dessert! Of course, dessert! Thanksgiving and dessert. They go hand and hand and even an IBD Foodie doesn’t have to skip dessert on Thanksgiving. Whether you’re a fan of pumpkin pie, pecan pie, or cookies, there’s a gut friendly recipe out there for you. Check out the internet, of course recipes abound there. Or you can check out the recipes for pumpkin pie and peanut butter kiss cookies in your IBD Foodie Thanksgiving cookbook. These are both Thanksgiving staples in my house. Everyone loves these desserts, kids and adults alike, and best of all, we now get to partake in dessert knowing it won’t upset our gut. You gotta love that.

With Thanksgiving just around the corner, I want to leave you with some quick general Thanksgiving eating tips I know will serve you no matter what you decide to eat.

Where are you eating your turkey dinner this year?

[28:43] Are you eating at home this year? Remember:

• This is the perfect time to experiment and try something new. With Covid and staying at home more, chances are there’s less family and friends around the table to impress. Why not use this opportunity to try something new?
• If foods like I mentioned in this episode are completely new for you, don’t feel like you need to follow my recipes to a T. Just try swapping out a couple items or think about the ingredients I mentioned that are most disruptive to your gut—the complex carbs, the sugars, and gluten. How can you lesson these ingredients from what you’re already making? Baby steps.
• Or do like I do for some dishes, I make both versions. Like mashed potatoes for example. I don’t ditch them for the whole family. They love them too much. I make celery root mash and mashed potatoes. Most everyone in my family takes both.

[30:03] Are you eating at a family member or friends house this year?

• #1, please be safe. Many countries around the world, and especially in the United States, we are in hard times with Covid. I want you to be safe, healthy and happy this holiday.
• If you’re worried about what’s going to be served, bring a dish or two to share with the group. You know it’s something you can eat and I bet the others will love it too.
• Don’t trust family or friends with your food. Many a helpful family tries to make things out of love. No one is questioning the good intentions here. Please be careful. I’ve seen this backfire for clients over and over again. Well-meaning family and friends want to be helpful and make something for you. Better to bring your own food to ensure you stay out of the bathroom after the meal.
• And if you’re on diets like SCD, GAPS, or Autoimmune Paleo, I say bring your own food 100%. To be a polite and generous guest, you can also bring a couple dishes for you, but also to share with everyone else too. Maybe the candied butternut squash or the stuffing. Don’t take a chance. It’s just not worth it. And I know from experience in situations like this, not every family member or friend is understanding. They might get annoyed or confused when you don’t eat their food. Trust me though, when they see how well you’re doing and how well you feel, they’ll come around. And even if they don’t, they’ll get used to it. You’re health isn’t worth jeopardizing to saves someone else’s feelings.

OK, there you have it. You have the tools to make this your best Thanksgiving yet, at least foodwise if only I had a recipe to whip up so you could safely be with everyone you love this holiday. I’ll keep wishing for that.

Don’t forget to grab your free cookbook.

Don’t forget to grab your very own copy of The IBD Foodie Thanksgiving Table Cookbook by going to the show notes or by going to karynhaley.com/thanksgiving. All the recipes we talked about today are waiting for you there. Remember, we are all different when it comes to IBD and the foods we tolerate. If you’re looking for a substitution, give me a shout. I’m here to help. You can get in touch at hello@karynhaley.com I love it when you reach out. It makes my day to connect with you.

Well, I don’t know about you, but I want Thanksgiving to be tomorrow. I can’t wait! And truth be told, it’s all about the food. Lots of gratitude and thanks, but also the FOOD. The delicious, nutritious, gut loving food that’s waiting for us to dive into on this special day of thanks and gratitude. I’ll be thinking of you dear one on Thanksgiving, wishing and hoping your day is filled with IBD foodie comfort food, the love of your family around you, and a safe and healthy place to enjoy it all.

Chat soon!

[34:33] Thank you so much for joining me today and for listening to today’s episode. When it comes to IBD, I know there’s a lot of resources out there, and I’m truly honored that you chose the Cheeky Podcast to get your IBD information today. If you found this information helpful, please give us a rating and review. It helps other moms find the podcast and see what we’re doing over here to help IBD moms everywhere. And if you feel called feel a call to do it, share this podcast with an IBD mom who you know could really use an uplifting message today, ’cause that’s what we’re all about over here at the Cheeky Podcast.

Are you ready to take your gut healing to the next level?

One last thing, if you’re still with me, and if you are, you’re definitely my kind of gal. We have to get to know each other better. If you’re tired of living on the hamster wheel of IBD with all the ups and downs between flares and remission, if you’re struggling to get control of your abdominal pain, gas, bloating, diarrhea and other troubling IBD symptoms, go to my website. It’s karynhaley.com, and my mom had to be just a little bit different, she spelled my name with the Y. So it’s K-A-R-Y-N H-A-L-E-Y.com and schedule your very own free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble-shooting session with me where we discuss the challenges you’ve been having, we set goals to help you move forward, and we talk about how we can work together to help you get your life back. It’s a power packed 30 minutes. You don’t have to live in IBD status quo. There’s so much that can be done to transform your life so you can thrive in motherhood and thrive with IBD. I’ve seen my clients walk this path and it gives me so much joy to take that journey with them.

My entire coaching practice is run online, so you never have to leave your house and you never have to get out of your jammy or yoga pants for us to work together. You know I’m wearing them to. If you’re ready to take your first amazing step towards healing, I’m ready to chat with you. Schedule your free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble shooting sesh today at karynhaley.com. Click on the work with me tab and I’ll see you soon. It’s important to note that the information in this podcast and in this episode is for general information purposes only and not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The statements made in the Cheeky Podcast for moms with IBD, either by me or my guests, is not intended to diagnose, treat, to cure, or prevent any disease. Before implementing any new treatment protocols, do yourself a favor and consult your physician first.

Thank you so much for listening, for being here, for saving this space for us to spend some time together. Until we chat again, I’m wishing you a cheeky and healthy IBD journey.

Ep 10: How to Find an IBD Doctor You’ll Rave About

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On a 1-5 rating scale, how would you rate your IBD doctor?

If you said a 2 or a 3 (or yikes, a 1), you’d be right in line with most of the Crohn’s and colitis mamas I talk to.

Why is it that we just can’t find a gastroenterologist we have confidence in?

Having searched for many doctors, both gastro and all kinds of other providers in my lifetime, I know there’s good ones out there. Doctors who become partners in our care, who see us as equals who bring value to our IBD journey.

Having a doctor who helps you feel empowered, confident, and courageous is what I want for you dear one. It can be the difference between constant flare-ups and finding remission. And that’s not an exaggeration.

It’s not a privilege to have a doctor who’s in your corner, it’s your right as a patient with Crohn’s or colitis.

In this episode, we’ll investigate how you can find a doctor you’ll actually rave about. I’m giving you the very tips I use to find excellent doctors who appreciate the value I bring to the doctor patient relationship. Plus, I’ll give you the exact questions to ask before you even step foot in the doctor’s office. These questions will ensure you get exactly what you need from your doctor.

We’ll talk about:

• Why it’s so frustrating and challenging every time we go to our doctor’s appointments
• The Top 5 high milage questions to ask before you go to any new doctor
• 8 amazing tips to build a great rapport with a new doc or build a better relationship with the doctor you currently have
• The 15 minute phone call that will change the way you see your doctor

And so much more!

After this episode, you’ll be in the driver’s seat to find the doctor you deserve to help you kick IBD to the curb or transform the relationship you have with your current provider in one with collaboration, connection, and compassion. No more dreading your IBD doctor’s appointments. Hello doctor patient bliss!

Episode at a Glance:

• [04;16] The frustration, annoyance and hopelessness you feel trying to find a doctor who’s a good fit for you.

• [08:16] All the traits doctors have that disrupt your IBD care.

• [12:02] How you can get a copy of my Top 5 Questions to Ask to Pick a Doctor You’ll Rave About so you can easily find the best doctor for you. No prep needed, just these questions and an inquisitive mind.

• [15:41] How going to the bathroom at your doctor’s office is the key to your confidence in the exam room and in conversations with your doctor.

• [19:54] How to make sure you’re in partnership with your doctor instead of putting up with a doctor who talks down to you or over your head.

• [23:16] How to develop your very own Wheel of Wellness so you have the knowledge and power of multiple providers and ways to heal.

• [27:08] How being anxious or nervous before a doctor’s appointment is actually a good sign.

• [32:16] The power of a 15-minute pre-doctor visit doctor to find out if this provider is a good fit for you.

Rate, Review and Subscribe on Apple Podcasts.

Episode Links:

Get my FREE pdf resource guide: The Top 5 Questions to Ask to Find a Doctor You’ll Rave About

How to Find an IBD Doctor You’ll Rave About (and get what you need from the doc you already have)

Win a copy of my cold and flu buster recipe guide (you’ve got the ingredients right in your kitchen).

[00:01] Hey there, Karyn here. Before we dive into the episode today, I wanted to take a quick moment to say thank you. Thanks for hanging out with me for the last couple months, and for your emails and texts with positive feedback for the show. Being here with you every Wednesday is something I really look forward to as we share our IBD mom journey together. It’s been even better than I dreamed it would be. I’m especially thankful to those who have taken the time to leave a positive review of the podcast on iTunes—like DeviaLea who writes: “I love her! Karyn I love how your get right to it and share your know how with us all!! I am so excited for this podcast!! Thank you girl!!!” Aww, right back attcha, DeviaLea. Thank you girll!!! That made my day when I read it so thank you for that.

I know it takes time out of your busy day to leave a rating and review, and I appreciate it when you do. It helps other moms find the podcast so we can support each other on our IBD journey. And to say thank you for you for leaving a rating and review, I’m currently giving away my Kitchen Arsenal Cure recipe guide just in time for cold and flu season, and of course coronavirus immune boosting as well. Keeping your immune system healthy is more important than ever. If you want to get your hands on my kitchen arsenal cure with 2 recipes to boost your immune system with ingredients you already have in your kitchen. Leave me a rating and review (a positive one I hope) on iTunes. Once you do, take a screen shot of it and email it to me with the subject line podcast review. I’ll immediately send my kitchen arsenal Cure recipe guide your way to say thanks for spreading the love and joy. Whether you leave a review or not, know that I appreciate you and thank you for listening to the show. Now let’s get to it.

[music]

INTRO: You are listening to The Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD, a safe space for moms with Crohn’s and colitis, connect, explore powerful tools for healing and transform our lives to thrive in motherhood and in life. I’m your host, Karyn Haley, IBD health coach, integrative wellness enthusiast, and mom to three outstanding kids. After having Crohn’s disease for 30 years and working as a health advocate exclusively with IBD clients for the last 10 years, I know it’s time to bring the types of candid conversations I have with my clients out into the open. It’s our time to go on an IBD healing journey and do it like only a mom can. Let’s do this.

[music]

Hey there my love, welcome to The Cheeky Podcast for Moms with IBD. It’s episode 10! We’re in double digits now!!!!  Whoop whoop! I don’t know about you but I can wait to keep this gut healing party going. I just mapped out the episodes through the end of the year, and let me tell you, we are in for some juicy IBD information.

Today’s episode is no exception.

Today, we’re highlighting our relationship with our doctors. This relationship always seems to be a tricky one to navigate for IBD mamas. Dare I say it might be more complicated that the one you have with your spouse!

[03:35] Let me ask you a question. Do you like your gastroenterologist? Do you even have a gastroenterologist, or did you stop going because he or she annoyed you so much?  Pretend you’re on health grades, and your giving your IBD doc a rating—what would it be? From my experience chatting with IBD moms, the likelihood of it being a five-star review is almost 0%. If you already have all your doctors (gastro and others) all of them in the five plus zone, this is probably not the episode for you. Go forth, enjoy your awesome doctor/patient relationships and thank your lucky stars for what you have.

[04:16] But if you’re finding yourself frustrated, annoyed, or anxious about your gastro visits like so many of the clients I see, this episode is going to give you so much clarity and so much power to take with you into your doctor’s office. And it’s also going to give you all the tools you need if you’re ready to take a bold leap and finally find the doctor of your dreams. He or she is out there, waiting for you to come knocking. I promise.

I certainly know a thing or two about hunting down a good gastroenterologist. I’ve done it several times in my 30 + year journey with Crohn’s. When I was first having digestive symptoms, I was young, only 14 years old. I had no clue what Crohn’s was, I had never heard of it. I don’t think I even knew what a gastroenterologist was. As one does at 14, I just went to the doc my mom took me to. Luckily, I had a health savvy nurse of a mama and she not only set me up with a caring gastro where I lived in Buffalo New York Dr. Jan Novak, but she also brought me to a specialist 3 hours from our home, shout out to Dr. Aaron Brezinski, at the Cleveland Clinic in Cleveland, Ohio.

Now, these docs were way western, medication only approaches all the way and at the time, I didn’t know anything about how food, lifestyle, and mindset factors could also be used to treat my disease. This was the late 80’s—it’s amazing how far we’ve come since then. But in their own western medicine way, they were both caring and kind, amazingly knowledgeable, especially Dr. Brezinski at the Cleveland Clinic. Even though I’ve since left the Cleveland area, that hospital will always hold a special place in my heart.

These two doctors, they saw me through the worst of my disease in my teens and into my early 20’s. I didn’t know how lucky I was at the time. I just thought all docs were like that. But then I married my hubby, and we started a whirlwind tour of the world for ten years, going from military base to military base. Sometimes we moved every year, and with each town and each move, it involved finding a new gastro, with them never living up to my first experience.

These ten years, when we moved around a lot with the military, where I never found a doc I felt comfortable with, and really they never even helped me at all, let’s just call it for what it was, it sucked. I felt alone in a sea of pain, diarrhea, despair, and hopelessness.

To anyone outside of the chronic illness world, this might seem quite dramatic, but I know you get it. I know you know this feeling all too well. You know just how alone you feel when you don’t really have someone in the medical profession who’s in your corner. You can have all the family and friend support in the world, and that’s great. But it’s not the same as someone who gets it, who gets you and everything you’re going through medically.

Not having the right doctor can do this to you. It can make you feel anxious, frustrated, depressed, and hopeless… and I’m not just talking about at the doctor’s office, but long after, and on a day to day basis.

Does this sound like your doctor?

[08:16] Doctors who:

• Don’t listen to things from your point of view
• Treat you like a number
• Don’t make eye contact because they’ve stuck their head in the computer or in their notes
• Talk down to you like they are the guru on high and you’re the lowly patient
• Rush you out of the office
• Don’t explain medications, or their decisions or your options for you as the patient
• Doctor who tell you what to do. Period. No room for discussion.
• Or give harsh examinations- which is a big deal as we are often getting our achy belly poked and our rectum prodded

These are the kinds of doctors I bet we’ve all dealt with from time to time. And it’s not ok. And more importantly, you don’t have to settle for it. Please, I implore you. Don’t settle for it. There is better care out there. And in this episode, I’m going to tell you how to get exactly what YOU need, from your doctor.

Now, before we go any further, please know that this is not a doctor bashing episode. That is not my intention at all. I’m not down on all doctors. Doctors have saved my life, my kids life and my mom’s life. The surgeon who did my first bowel resection, Dr. Jeffery Milson… outstanding! The doctor who diagnosed my son with Neurocardiogenic Syncope, Dr. De La Uz, fantastic. Whole team of oncology doctors who have kept my mom going an unheard of amount of time—5 years– with liver cancer- I could just hug each of them.  Lord knows I’ve known some great ones. And I bet you have too. Currently have several doctors I love. But it was work to find them, let me tell you. I never took the easy road to find them, I never settled like I might have years ago. Finding the right doctor involved knowing exactly what I needed from a doctor whether it was for me or my family members and then, ASKING them it they were able to deliver on what I needed.

There are many ways you can get the most out of your relationship with your doctor, but one of the best things you can do is make sure you have the right doctor for you. The right doctor for you may not be the right doctor for me. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder with life partners and with doctors too.

If you’re goal is to work with the right doctor that fits your needs, especially when it comes to your gastroenterologist, then the best thing to do is start by picking the right gastro right from the start. Sure, if you’re already in a relationship with a doctor you don’t care for, but switching isn’t an option, there are things you can do to improve the relationship (and we’ll get to those ways in just a minute), but it’s much easier to develop the best relationship you can with your medical provider if you start from scratch. I want you to be equipped with the tools you need to do just that. Picking a great gastro, and YES you can, starts with knowing what questions to ask, either before you ever go (which is my preference) or asking those questions at your first appointment (keeping in mind, you never have to go back if you have a bad experience).

[12:02] I’ve created a guide to help you with this whole process. My Top 5 Questions to Ask to Pick a Doctor You’ll Rave About. It’s a pdf guide available to you right now. Over the years, with lots of failed and finally successful attempts at finding the gastro for me, I’ve learned that these 5 questions are the key to helping you feeling empowered, educated, and on an equal playing field with any doctor you choose to allow into your sacred health space.

Trust me, this guide is fabulous. You’re going to want to have it and keep it on hand. You can get my guide by going directly to the shown notes for episode 10 or by going to karynhaley.com/doctor Whether you need it now or not, I would go ahead and get it. And this guide will work for any practitioner, not just gastros. If you want to get this guide: My Top 5 Questions to Ask to Pick a Doctor You’ll Rave About, go to karynhaley.com/doctor—that’s k-a-r-y-n-h-a-l-e-y.com/doctor and it will come straight to your inbox.

Now, if you’re at that point where you know it’s not a good fit with your doctor and you’re going doctor shopping, these 5 questions are all you need to set up a safe doctor-patient space you can growth with, feel nurtured and educated with.

But what if you have a doctor already and you’re not thrilled with your choice, but you see potential there. You’re not ready to kick them to the curb just yet.

There’s always ways you can improve your relationship with your partner, right? Just like partners have to work at a relationship, so do doctors and their patients. Besides having these 5 questions on hand for picking the right doctor for you, I also want you to have my best tips for molding your relationship with your gastro, or any other provider you have, into the one you want it to be. Even if you are just starting out with a new doctor, and especially in this case, these tips I’m about to give you will set the stage for positivity and collaboration right from the start.

It’s so much easier, in any relationship, when we start it off on a supportive and collaborative foot. But know that it’s OK if you didn’t. It might take a little more time and effort, but if you think there’s hope, it’s always a good idea to stick with it and try to make the changes you want to see. If you truly give it a good try and you know you’ve given it your all, at least you will have learned a ton for your next doctor patient relationship.

OK- here are my 8 must do tips you can use to make sure that when you talk, your doctor will listen. If you follow these tips, you will have a relationship with your doctor where you look forward to office visits (imagine that?), you’ll feel valued within your partnership, and best of all, because of this relationship, your health will move in a positive direction.

[15:41] Tip # 1

Go into your next doctor’s appointment with confidence.

Seems simple right? You know you’re in charge. You’re not a wallflower, waiting to be bestowed with powerful wisdom. You’re a mom in charge, a go-getter in the workforce, a partner in crime with your spouse… I know you already know this about other areas of your life, but something seems to happen to us between our head and what comes out of our mouth in the doctor’s exam room. Our thoughts which were crystal clear at home, become mush in the doctor’s office, and furthermore, what we verbalize to our doctor is often a curated version of what’s actually going on in our head.

One of the best ways to make sure that the confidence you have in your heart when you leave the house, sticks with you during the long wait in the waiting room is to plan a trip to the bathroom once you get checked in. Stick with me here, because this will make sense in a sec. When you go to the bathroom, feel free to go if you need to, but the real reason you’re there is to look yourself in the mirror, and remind yourself you are a strong confident woman—sorry I just lost myself in Chandelier from that old episode of friends—but unlike Chandelier, you actually are a strong, confident, woman so this type of positive self-talk will work better on you.

Yes, your doctor went to medical school, so yes, they do have medical knowledge we may not have, but that doesn’t mean what you bring to the table is any less important. Go in with the confidence of knowing that no one knows your body better than you, that you set the tone and flow of the appointment and you know that you will walk away feeling just as empowered, confident, and self-assured as when you came in. You’ve got this girlfriend. Go in with power.

Tip # 2

Go to your doctor’s appointment educated.

Think your doc might be ready for a talk about biologics, or scheduling you for a colonoscopy, or even a surgery? Read up on your options before your appointment. The internet is a beautiful thing my friend. Podcasts like this one, YouTube, research studies… you never know where you’re going to find valuable information about your IBD options. Sure, some of the information may not be so accurate. We know that for all the good information out there, there’s also a lot of bogus info too. But if you choose your sources wisely and are a savvy and skeptical consumer of info like I know you are, you’ll be able to sift through the nonsense and get straight to the credible. Plus, once you’re armed with this knowledge ahead of your appointment, you’re ready to ask the right questions of your medical provider.

Which brings us to tip #3

Always go into your appointment with a list of questions

—hand or phone written, not in your head. Trust me on this mama, you’ll never remember them, even the most seasoned IBDer’s. Once that exam gets started, the poking and prodding, once you hear bad news, or heck even good news… those questions rush right out of your head.

Go with questions and focus on the high milage questions first. You never know when you’ll be shuffled out. Ask the important ones first.

[19:54] Tip # 4

Never let your provider talk over you or down to you

Remember I mentioned that your doctor is smart? They went to medical school and learned all kinds of technical, medical language. Sometimes they just aren’t able to bring all that terminology and medical smarts down to our level and sometimes it’s almost like they are patting us on the head, saying OK little girl, now go do what you’re told.

Hopefully you’ve never had to experience a condescending doctor. Thankfully they are few and far between, but I remember one I had to deal with when my hubby and I had been trying to get pregnant for 2 years with no success and were seeing a fertility specialist. This doctor literally patted me on the head, told me all our fertility issues were most likely in my head. Furthermore, he informed me I probably wasn’t getting pregnant because I didn’t weigh enough and asked if I had an eating disorder. This was all after I explained to him that I had Crohn’s and had trouble keeping weight on. I’ve never wanted to smack a doctor more than in that moment. I immediately left, and never went back again.

I cried all the way home, feeling so humiliated. He took and already emotionally fraught experience, that of a couple experiencing infertility, and made me feel shameful and guilty for my role in it. Shame on him and any doctor who deliberately talks down to their patient. You don’t need to put up with treatment like this. If it ever happens, remember, there’s lots of other fish in the sea. Take my fertility example. I quickly made an appointment with a sane fertility specialist who was kind, compassionate, and understanding. After meeting her, we were pregnant within 3 months.

Tip # 5

Don’t stay if you’re unhappy

This one ties in nicely with the tip was just talked about, tip # 4. If you are unhappy with your gastro for whatever the reason… you don’t like the office staff, you don’t like the options the doc has laid out for you, you don’t like the energy of the office… whatever you’re reason. It doesn’t have to be a tangible reason.  Don’t stay if you’re unhappy.

How likely do you think it is that you’ll comply with a doctor or a practice you just don’t get good vibes from?

In cases like this, is there another doctor you might try in the same practice? How about a town over—or 4 towns over? Be willing to go that extra mile (sometimes literally) to find the doctor you mesh with. Trust me, there’s an amazing doctor waiting to serve you. Keep looking. You will find them.

[23;16] Tip # 6

Have your very own Wheel of Wellness

Ok, I have to confess, this is my top favorite tip. My clients hear about the wheel of wellness all the time. So here’s the deal. I said it before and I’ll say it again, if you’ve got Crohn’s or colitis, you need a gastroenterologist. You never know when you’ll need one. Whether you visit once a month or one every couple years, have a contact you can call on just in case.

Having a gastro is important, but what’s that saying about eggs and baskets. Oh, right. Never put all your eggs in one basket. In the world of health, this means that you don’t leave all your care to one person. Healing from Crohn’s and colitis works best when you diversify. Your wheel of wellness might include doctors like your gastro, a PCM, a gynecologist. But it might also include other practitioner areas like a naturopath, a functional medicine provider, an acupuncturist, a health coach like me or a nutritionist. Your wheel of wellness should also include some form of movement like restorative yoga or Pilates, swimming or walking as well as a spiritual practice like prayer or meditation, art therapy, dance therapy or straight up talk therapy as well.

What’s in your current wheel of wellness? Are you diversified enough? It’s unlikely that you’ll find lasting healing from just one expert. Build a team around you, to guide and support you, with all your needs being met. Healing takes a village. Start to create your village today. Remember, you’re at the heart of the village, you’re the leader, and the   community needs a leader to lead. Create your own team and you’ll be happier and healthier for it.

Tip # 7

Go in on a level playing field

Instead of going to the doctor’s office, expecting your physician to solve all your problems, go into your appointments armed with all that information you gathered back in tip #2 when you got yourself educated. Go into that appointment, seeing you and your provider as partners—partners on your healing journey. Partners who communicate, collaborate, and consider all the options together.

How awesome would that be? It’s possible and it’s a beautiful thing to experience. Remember though, equals doesn’t mean you both bring the same thing to the table. Your doctor has expertise and great knowledge, hopefully in IBD specifically. This wisdom is of great value and should be appreciated for all it offers.

That doesn’t mean you don’t bring just as much value to your doctor’s appointment. No one, I mean absolutely no one knows you better than you. That’s valuable information. Using information like this to partner with your doctor on an even playing field can only benefit your care.

Think of your doctor as a wise mentor, guiding you, giving you sage advice. And the key piece here is ADVICE. Not the law of the land… advice that you then have a wonderfully collaborative conversation about to make the best decision for you.

[28:07] Tip # 8

It’s OK to be anxious

It’s normal to be nervous when you go to any doctor’s appointment, even with a doctor you truly like and trust. You’re going to see that doctor about something near and dear to your heart- your IBD. It’s upended your life, it’s changed everything… of course you are going to be anxious when you see the doctor.

This completely makes sense. The doctor’s office is also often the place where you’re sitting when you get bad news. It’s often the place where you get poked and prodded by the doctor and that can be uncomfortable and sometimes hurt.

And guess what? You can still have confidence, be educated about your illness, have good questions for the doc, and be anxious at the same time. Being anxious or feeling stressed when you go to the doctor’s office just means you care and you want the best for your health.

So next time you find yourself feeling that way, I say go with it. Don’t fight it. Go with it. The anxiety in this particular moment might actually serve you will.

So there you have it- my top 8 must do tips you can use to make sure that when you talk, your doctor will listen. Let’s do a quick recap:

Here they are:

1. Go into your doctor’s appointment with confidence
2. Go into the office educated about your options
3. Go with a list of questions
4. Never let your doctor talk down to you
5. Don’t stay if you’re unhappy
6. Develop your very own wheel of wellness
7. Keep a level playing field
8. It’s OK to be anxious

Use these tips as your guide, whether you’re on the hunt for a new doctor or repairing a relationship with an old one. They will serve you well, no matter what kind of doctor you’re seeing.

And just because I always want you to be fully armed and ready for anything, I’ve got just a few bonus thoughts for you on this subject. Just a couple honorable mentions that I’d be remiss if I didn’t, well, mention…

A few more bonus tips for your consideration

Here they are:

Know when to get a second opinion. It’s not distrust in your doctor, it’s just good health sense. Also, always be honest with your doctor, lying about how you feel or your compliance with a medication always leads to disaster. And lastly, even though I’ve been talking non-stop here about always having a good rapport with your doctor, there are times when there’s more important things than a good rapport. For example, a surgeon doesn’t have to hold your hand, your partner can do that. A surgeon just needs to be a good surgeon. Now I’ve met some truly wonderful surgeons in my life, like Dr. Milsom whom I mentioned earlier, but if someone is cutting me open, I care more about their skill in the operating room than their bedside manner.

OK, some final thoughts before we wrap up.

Have you ever picked a worker or contractor for a home improvement project? How about a babysitter for your kids? Would you hire them sight unseen? Not likely. You would never trust a huge house project or the care of your kids to a stranger.

[32:16] Why are we asked to do this when it comes to our gastroenterologist or any other doctor we see? The truth is, we aren’t. Most people just don’t know that they can actually interview a potential doctor before ever going to the first appointment. Just think, for just a little bit of time up front, how much time you’ll save going to doctor’s appointments with doctors who are actually a good fit for you.

Most doctor’s offices allow you a quick 15 minute meet and greet (over the phone) with the provider to see if they are a good match. Of course, most don’t advertise it, but if you call and ask, they’ll make it happen.

When searching for a doctor in a particular specialty, I’d pick about three options to start. You can find these doctors through internet searchs, other doctor’s, but the best referral of all is usually from a friend you trust. Once you have your doctor’s in mind, and you’ve secured a 15 minute phone call, remember to make your questions succient and be ready for rapid fire. Doctors don’t have a lot of time so make the most of the time you have. And if the doctor absolutely doesn’t have time for a quick 15 minute chat, I’d also accept a chat with his or her nurse. They can usually answer many of your initial questions and you can decide if you want to give the doctor a trial run with your first appointment.  If the office won’t even make time for that, I say so long Charlie—definitely not my kind of practice.

Remember, during this 15-minute potential doctor call, you don’t even have to wonder about what questions you’re going to ask. It’s all covered for you with my pdf guide: The Top 5 Questions to Ask to Pick a Doctor You’ll Rave About. It gives you the best, most high milage questions to ask on your call. After these A’s to your Q’s, you’ll feel more confident in your choice of provider and go into your first appointment ready to crush those 8 doctor patient tips we went over today.

Grab your FREE pdf guide below

If you want to be ready for your next potential doctor interview get the guide: My Top 5 Questions to Ask to Pick a Doctor You’ll Rave About. Go directly to the episode 10 show notes or get the guide at karynhaley.com/doctor.

I can’t wait to hear how this goes for you. Let me know will ya? Email me at hello@karynhaley.com and let me know how this episode landed for you. Does it sound crazy? Are you already doing this and want to share another tip with our mom tribe. Let me know where you’re with finding a provider you rave about to your friends and family. I can’t wait to hear from you.

Wishing you a cheeky and healthy IBD healing journey.

Chat soon!

Thank you so much for joining me today and for listening to today’s episode. When it comes to IBD, I know there’s a lot of resources out there, and I’m truly honored that you chose the Cheeky Podcast to get your IBD information today. If you found this information helpful, please give us a rating and review. It helps other moms find the podcast and see what we’re doing over here to help IBD moms everywhere. And if you feel called feel a call to do it, share this podcast with an IBD mom who you know could really use an uplifting message today, ’cause that’s what we’re all about over here at the Cheeky Podcast.

[35:49] One last thing, if you’re still with me, and if you are, you’re definitely my kind of gal. We have to get to know each other better. If you’re tired of living on the hamster wheel of IBD with all the ups and downs between flares and remission, if you’re struggling to get control of your abdominal pain, gas, bloating, diarrhea and other troubling IBD symptoms, go to my website. It’s karynhaley.com, and my mom had to be just a little bit different, she spelled my name with the Y. So it’s K-A-R-Y-N H-A-L-E-Y.com and schedule your very own free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble-shooting session with me where we discuss the challenges you’ve been having, we set goals to help you move forward, and we talk about how we can work together to help you get your life back. It’s a power packed 30 minutes. You don’t have to live in IBD status quo. There’s so much that can be done to transform your life so you can thrive in motherhood and thrive with IBD. I’ve seen my clients walk this path and it gives me so much joy to take that journey with them.

My entire coaching practice is run online, so you never have to leave your house and you never have to get out of your jammy or yoga pants for us to work together. You know I’m wearing them to. If you’re ready to take your first amazing step towards healing, I’m ready to chat with you. Schedule your free 30-minute IBD root cause trouble shooting sesh today at karynhaley.com. Click on the work with me tab and I’ll see you soon. It’s important to note that the information in this podcast and in this episode is for general information purposes only and not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The statements made in the Cheeky Podcast for moms with IBD, either by me or my guests, is not intended to diagnose, treat, to cure, or prevent any disease. Before implementing any new treatment protocols, do yourself a favor and consult your physician first.

Thank you so much for listening, for being here, for saving this space for us to spend some time together. Until we chat again, I’m wishing you a cheeky and healthy IBD journey.